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i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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