I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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