So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize