I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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