so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
