porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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