His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
apparently the secret to your success is patron
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize