super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
