Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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