His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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