i was born a porn star she said
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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