think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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