OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
