I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
