hotel room ftw
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
