I'm jealous of your bromance
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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