Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
