pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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