So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
