i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
