this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
