All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
