Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
