what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
