id be glad to
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
