Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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