Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
