She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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