I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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