my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
