You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
