If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
