All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
