ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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