Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
