i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize
