Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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