This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
