Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
