It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
This house was built for laser tag.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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