Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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