Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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