so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I cut my penus on the lid.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I would ride that face into the sunset
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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