Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
