she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
