just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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