His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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