The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
