Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
