the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
